11/1/11

Speaking of the work…. first we connect through story, find our common “belief and values agreement” – the WHY of being here together. Then we share HOW we use it to bring WHAT we do into the world…. and hopefully don’t trigger the “backfire effect.”

When therapists are first learning this work, in their enthusiasm to share what’s been so powerful and transformative for them, it’s not uncommon to run into folks who are so entrenched in their current stories that they rigidly defend against anything new.

***sympathetic drive activated***

This is known as “the Backfire Effect,” described at length here.  And described more colloquially here.

How do we find the connection that lets us connect through the WHY, and holds space for a range of HOW, to get us to a similar WHAT?

After all, as Simon Sinek reminds us, “People don’t buy what you do, they buy WHY you do it”

Think about what you learned in your first NVI classes. We are all craving the safety of connection through our parasympathetic systems. It’s the foundation of whatever stories are layered on top of it. If you root around under the range of “what/stories” that other folks espouse, it all springs from the same desire to land safely in ourselves.

We just access it more directly, honoring the grounded neurophysiology of it.

We’re starting with a similar “WHY” – so let’s connect through that, and let the wide array of How/What stories be honored.

This is how we build our connections, and our tribe.

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